Flicking through the Sydney Morning Herald this little article ‘How to be happy at work’ caught my eye (yes, the quality of the Fairfax Press has deteriorated that badly!).  I kid you not the following ten points are from the article.  Italics are mine.

1. Organise a daily coffee run.

The short walk to the cafe may be just the way to build better relationships with your workmates. Take the chance to get a breath of fresh air, a chat and a hit of caffeine to start the working day.(Translation: Carefully manage the logistics of taking the coffee order, collecting the money and distributing the caffeine and you could easily waste fill two hours of your day with management’s blessing).

2. Secretly smile to yourself as often as you can.

Smiling is said to relieve stress, so do it whenever you can. But try to keep your smiles genuine or risk looking a little unhinged. (Translation: No-body likes a sad sack at work…though the author does not quite understand the words ‘secretly smile to yourself’). 

3. Let the music play.

“I use music to help energise or relax myself,” says Ore. “I select music to energise me for the trip to work and to relax on the way home, it makes me very happy.” (Translation: MP3 players are essential in the modern workplace).

4. Change it up.

If you aren’t happy at work, something needs to change. It might be your working hours, where you work from, who you work with or simply the job itself. Be brave enough to make the changes needed to be a happier individual, says Rennie. “Love it or change it, this is my internal mantra,” he says. (Translation: Everyone is happier when they don’t have to work).

5. Spring clean.

It may be a tough ask for office slobs, but a thorough desk tidy will keep unhappiness at bay by helping you feel more organised and in control of your workload. (Translation: Happiness can be achieved by inhaling cleaning chemicals).

6. Say thank you.

Is there someone at work who really deserves praise? Buy them a gift or a card to acknowledge your appreciation of their help, Sharp advises. You’ll find workmates are more likely to work co-operatively if they know their efforts are valued. (Translation: Your colleagues need to be bribed to do their work as management has failed to do their job).

7. Learn something new.

Don’t let your skills become out-dated and irrelevant. It’s a sure-fire way to feel left behind and unhappy. Learn the favourite hobby of the person sitting next to you or something more complex such as enrolling in that course you’ve always dreamed about. (Translation: Be an independent learner.  If that fails emulate the person sitting next to as the Single White Female situation always ends well.)

8. Have lunch or coffee with someone at work you don’t know well.

No one’s saying you have to be besties, but a short chat with a colleague while you sip your latte could have personal and professional benefits. (Translation: Because everyone wants a stalker at work).

9. Do a quiz with your workmates at lunch.

A time-honoured lunchtime tradition at many an Australian workplace. You’ll get to know your workmates a little better, improve your general knowledge and take a short break from work. What’s not to like? (Lost in Translation: Huh? Someone please nominate one workplace in Australia that has a lunchtime quiz.  Just one.)

10. Write a profile on yourself.

You never know when the company or a client may need a short bio about you and experience. It’s an easy way to feel good about yourself. (Translation: Update your Linkedin Profile/FB status,trawl Seek while you seriously question the competency of HR who have not read your CV).

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